Light Side
Norm Coleman Joins Witless Protection Program
By Daily Pox 19/4/09
Apr 21, 2009 - 10:02:02 AM

ST. PAUL-- Stumbling, hapless Senator Norm Coleman (R-MN) decided today to flee from his losing political battle with comedian Al Franken. “I know I’ll be the one they’re laughing at,” said Coleman, “so I decided to enter the federal witless protection program.”

Witless protection is offered to public figures who have either lost their wits or, as in the case of Coleman, never had many to begin with. According to program director Pamela Buntlow, “It’s important that poor, clueless Mr. Coleman disappear from public view. We’ll hide him in some state like Alabama and give him a new name, probably Holden Merkly. We might also give him a real job.”

“Well,” Coleman told reporters, “I guess this is goodbye. By the way, I hate myself.”

Source: Ocnus.net 2009